


I (should) know better

by Nixon Cairns (sharplancel)



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Allura Angst, Allurangst, Angst, F/M, Hope you'll like it!, I feel quite bad for her, In a hoping sense?, It's an Allura centric story, It's more on how Allura deal with things, It's really short, It's sad for Allura here, M/M, One-Sided Allurance, Post Season 7, She has a lot of self-doubt, She talks to her dad, So did my friends, Sort Of, Where they're all in the Garrison, i guess, love problems, something like that
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-27
Updated: 2018-10-27
Packaged: 2019-08-08 08:48:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,133
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16426202
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sharplancel/pseuds/Nixon%20Cairns
Summary: She knows.She knows that Lance still loves Keith. She knows their situations and why they couldn't be together. Something about Lance's family saying that he shouldn't be with a boy. She doesn't let it take over her thoughts, but somehow it still does."I know he still loves him. Keith mayhaps moved on from him. But Lance's feelings remain." She lets out a sob, and knows that she has unshed tears piling up. "Why am I hoping for something I know I can't have..."--------------------------------Wherein Allura watches Lance and Keith deal with their relationship. Maybe Lance likes her back? Or is he still hung up?





	I (should) know better

**Author's Note:**

> Goodmornight! This is the first story I'm posting here and I made this story a few days ago for me and my friends. I wanted to try and post this and share it with you guys! I hope you'll enjoy this stream-of-consciousness styled story :>

_Day 15_

She knows.

She knows that Lance still loves Keith. She knows their situations and why they couldn't be together. Something about Lance's family saying that he shouldn't be with a boy. She doesn't let it take over her thoughts, but somehow it still does.

She knows that she shouldn't keep hoping. That he wouldn't find any interest in her. Lance didn't look at her as he did years back when they first met.

Allura turns off her datapad and rolls over to face the edge of her bed, glancIng at the empty wall. "Father, what should I do?" She says to no one In particular. Maybe it was directed to herself, but she didn't let the thought linger.

"I know he still loves him. Keith mayhaps moved on from him. But Lance's feelings remain." She lets out a sob, and knows that she has unshed tears piling up. "Why am I hoping for something I know I can't have..."

 

 

_Day 30_

"Oh come on Allura, It'll be fun!" Lance exclaims as he drags her to the toy store.

"I don't really understand what would be the use of this hangout. Tell me again why we need to buy me a miniature toy that resembles an animal stuffed with cotton? It sounds outrageous. I don't get how you humans find that cute." She inquires as she lets herself be dragged by the boy who rolls his eyes but laughs.

They stop in front of a store with lights that could be seen from blocks away. The insides are painted with pastel colors as the ceiling remains white. Each shelf is painted with a specific pattern, minimalistic but resembles whatever item remains on the shelf.

Lance brings the two of them over to the stuffed animal section. He goes over each toy, explaining whatever sort of animal it tried to look like. Allura finds remains both intrigued and puzzled as she giggles the further the boy goes through the aisle.

Lance continues to explain what environment the last anImal had. He was so engrossed by it that he didn't notice Allura stopping her tracks to hold onto one of the toys.

"You want that?" He asks as he steps beside her. "It's a dolphin."

"A dolphin..." Allura's eyes glitter under the thousands of lights above them as if she found hidden treasure that no one but her could see. "It's beautiful."

Lance looks at her and gives her a soft smile. "It's a water animal. They are known to be easily trained and are both friendly and accepting."

"Quite like the Blue Lion and It's paladin, yes?" Allura takes a glance at Lance and smiles at him.

Lance lets out a laugh as he bends over and tries to keep his composure. He wipes his ears away and puts a hand on her shoulder to keep him steady. "Yeah, just like our lion."

They share a moment of silence and Lance takes the dolphins from her hands ever so softly. "Let's go buy you this 'lil blue boy." He says, sending her a smile.

Lance and Allura reach the counter and Lance offers to pay. Allura holds the dolphin close to her chest and Lance decides to name it Agua Río. To which Allura looks up later and ends up laughing to herself in her room.

 

 

_Day 42_

Keith hasn't kept in contact with Lance in a while. He keeps hIm at arms length, unless it calls for a mission or a task that they need to do together. They don't have problems interacting, but it feels as if everything went back to how it was at the beginning.

Lance remains himself. But Allura knows better. She knows what Lance feels because she knows whats happening. She knows what's currently going through his head as she keeps in contact with the boy since she was assigned to take care of Atlas with Shiro. The Garrison decided to create a separate base and place it a few blocks from their location, so that it wouldn't take up much space.

Allura is in her room along with the four mice. "Do you think he's happy?" She asks them. They give her a feeling of happiness, assuring her that they think he does, while some of them know the truth. Her link with the mice remained after all these years.

She continues talking to the mice, conversing as if they were her closest friends. (They are) The sound of the doors sliding open makes her jolt that her books drop off her shelf.

"I'm so so sorry Allura. i didn't mean to startle you. Are you ok?" Hunk asks as he quickly helps her pick up the books and place them back on the shelf.

"I'm good, thank you I was just talking to the mice before you came in." She sends him a smile for reassurance, placing the last set of books back. "What made you visit? Is the power supply from the Balmeran crystal malfunctioning with the equipment again?"

Hunk waves his hands in front of his face as he stands up. "No no, that's not it." He laughs "I just wanted to check up on you! You've been out of the blue since..." He scratches his nape as he glances to anywhere but Allura.

"I'm fine Hunk, thank you for checking up on me. I appreciate the gesture." She dusts off her skirt and stands up. "I've been able to keep my kind alive this long, I can survive a little heartache" She says, sounding very bittersweet.

It was supposed to sound like a lighthearted joke, but Hunk could see and hear pass through her outer exterior. "You don't have to hide it Allura. Lance is an understanding guy, he'll hear you through." He tells her as he gives her shoulders a tiny squeeze. 

"I know. He's caring in that sense. He always watches what he says and apologizes when needed." She giggles. "I'll get through this Hunk. No time for romancing when the universe still needs someone to take care of one of the thousands, maybe billions, of altean and galran tech that we could come up with."

The two remain silent for a few minutes. Hunk looks at her with a look that could resemble how people look at sad cat videos. Allura gives him a small smile before Hunk nods.

He lets out a sigh as he removes his hands from her shoulders and giver her a hug. She reciprocates the action and hums silently. "'Thank you, Hunk." "

No problem. I'll be here when you need someone to talk to!" And with that Hunk leaves the room with a goodbye and a wave, leaving Allura to sigh as she plummets to the bed with a sigh.

 

 

_Day 71_

"Princess!" Lance shouts as he sees her at the end of the hallway. She looks his way and waves.

"Hello Lance. How are you?" She asks as she gives the student an order before she leaves.

Lance waits until she finishes her job, then grabs her hands in his. "Can you help me with something?" He looks at her straight through her eyes. He seemed so happy and excited that Allura couldn't say no to.

"What seems to be the matter?" She asks as she walks slowly to the exit, Lance following soon after.

"I wanted to make a gift for someone." He replies."For who?"

"Someone important." He smiles at her, as if he was talking about her.

Even if she knew better, Allura can see the hint of sadness in his eyes. ' _Keith'_ she thinks. _'It's not for me. Stop hoping.'_

"I'd gladly help out with your little project. Just let me pass by my room to change. I'll meet you at the lounge?"

"Great! See you in a bit!" Lance zooms out the door on the way to his dorm.

The silence of the room makes Allura think that she could her her heart shatter a little more than it should.

 

 

_Day 82_

Allura enters the meeting room and she sees Keith at the other end of the room, sitting down with papers in front of him.

Keith's head shoots right up as the door sends a bang throughout the room. "Allura." He says, sounding tired from the lack of sleep for the past few days of missions from Voltron and dealing with updates from the Blade of Marmora.

"Sorry for the disturbance. You needed me?" She takes a seat near him.

Keith grabs one of the pieces of paper as he holds the edges a bit too much that it crumples. "Yeah..." He whispers to himself. "Yeah." He looks at Allura.

He folds the piece of paper and slides it over to her on the table. After doIng so, he continues to check the papers on by one. "May I ask why you gave me this?"

She opens the piece of paper and remains blank faced while her eyes glance over the words written in it.

"Please give it to him if you have the time." She nods, understanding it immediately, and exits the room.

Allura walks to her room in silence with tears falling off from her face. 

 

 

Day 86

Allura is seen giggling at her datapad. "What are you looking at?" Pidge asks as they look over their shoulder. They see that she has her chatheads open.

She quickly closes the application and looks up at them, flustered. "Nothing! Just keeping myself up to date with your race's...what do you call this." As she recalls it, she jolts. "Ah yes! 'linggo'" She air quotes.

Pidge gives her a suspicious look but decides to shrug and leave her to do her own business. Allura looks back at her wallpaper and her cheeks tint red as she notices what her homescreen's wallpaper is.

A photo of the Cuban boy she first saw after her 10,000 year sleep. His blue eyes glimmering as the sunlight hits him in such a way that his figure is precisely shown as half a silhouette and half a sun kissed skinned human. His smile reaches his eyes as if the photo was taken in the middle of someone telling him a joke. His shirt reads 'It gets tiring to be Handsome, But someone has to do it' in a gradient of three colors.

She lets our a tiny giggle and hopes her ginger haired friend couldn't hear her. Opening the chathead she once closed, she recieves a message from the said Cuban boy.

Lance: _Are you free tomorrow?_

Allura does nothing else but frown. She has to see him, she didn't expect it to be this soon.

 

 

_Day 87_

"I can't be with you because I know you're still wrapping yourself around his finger, so It's okay. I'll be fine Lance." Allura hugs him hesitantly as Lance's hands stay frozen in place. She saw right through him, yet he doesn't know if he should be happy or concerned about his friend.

Allura lets go of him and looks him in the eye. "He's waiting for you." She reaches for her pocket and grabs Lance's hand. As she walks away, Lance opens his hand to see a piece of paper with someone's messy handwriting.

 _"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have hurt you. It's still the same, isn't it?"_ he read out to himself. His finger brushes over the signature of the messenger's name. _'Keith'_

Lance doesn't spare a single second as he sprints to where he thinks Keith would stay.

Hidden at the corner of the rooftop, Keith lets his legs drape over the edge as he watches the sunset. "Hey."

"Hey yourself." Lance replies as he sits beside him.

"You should say sorry to Allura." Keith glances over at Lance. He sees how the cuban boy looks hurt, yet pleased that he said more than 'hey' or a mission to him for the past months.

The two paladins talk through their night until the sun sets.

 

 

_Day 93_

Allura smiles as she sees Keith and Lance talk to each other more often than they did a few days back.

She feels the bond growing more into what she saw a few years back. She talks to he mice in her room one night. "I'm happy." She says to them.

Platt looks at her questioningly. "They seem to have found each other's company to be more than what they thought. It's nice to see them make up their mind after a few decaphoebs."

She sighs as she glances at her ceiling. "Thank you for watching over me, Father. I'll be sure to take care of everything from here on out."

She smiles to herself before drifting off to sleep.

It's been a wild ride, but she'll get through it. She knows she will.


End file.
